The Ant & The Grasshopper

The Ant & The Grasshopper
- A Modern Fable -

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The Grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and so he laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. But the Grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies, out in the cold and all alone.

(American Story Version - Updated 1998)

Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC, and ABC show up and provide pictures of the shivering Grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can it be that, in a country of such wealth, this poor Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Then a representative of the NAAGB (National Association of Green Bugs) shows up on Nightline and charges the ant with "green bias" and makes the case that the Grasshopper is actually a victim of 30 million years of "greenism." Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the Grasshopper, and everybody cries when he sings, "It's Not Easy Being Green. "

President Bill and First Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton make a special guest appearance on the CBS Evening News to tell a concerned Dan Rather that they will do everything they can for the Grasshopper who has been denied the prosperity he deserves by those who benefitted unfairly during the Reagan summers, or as Bill refers to it, the "Temperatures of the 80's.

Richard Gephardt exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the Grasshopper and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share. Finally, the EECO drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Greenism Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

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