Facts About Children

Facts About Children

A child will not spill on a dirty floor.
A young child is a noise with dirt on it.
A youth becomes a man when the marks he wants to leave on the world have nothing to do with tires.
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.
Having children will turn you into your parents.
If you have trouble getting your children's attention, just sit down and look comfortable.
Money isn't everything, but it sure keeps the kids in touch.
One child is often not enough, while two children can be far too many.
Summer vacation is a time when parents realize that teachers are grossly underpaid.
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.
There are three ways to get things done:
1. do it yourself
2. hire someone to do it
3. forbid your kids to do it
There would be fewer problems with children if they had to chop wood to keep the television set going.
Those who say they "sleep like a baby" haven't got one.

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