The 9 Types of Boyfriends

The 9 Types of Boyfriends
Joe Sensitive - "After I wash the dishes, let's cuddle, OK?"
Advantages: Well-behaved; irons own shirts
Disadvantages: Irritatingly compassionate, wimpy

Old Man Grumpus - "People are stupid. The world can go to hell.Let's stay home and watch TV."
Advantages: Stays put; predictable
Disadvantages: Royal pain in the ass

Flinchy - "I--I'm sorry for whatever it was I did."
Advantages: Jumps entertainingly when startled
Disadvantages: Easily spooked; surrenders without a struggle

Bigfoot - "Shut yer trap, I'm thinkin'."
Advantages: Can tote bales; is easily fooled
Disadvantages: Can break you in half, sweats like a pig

Lazybones - "Zzzzzz"
Advantages: Well rested; easy target
Disadvantages: Unlikely to fulfill your dreams

The Sneak - "Who, me?"
Advantages: May feel pangs of guilt
Disadvantages: May be having time of his life

Ace of Hearts - "After I wash the dishes let's make love like crazed weasels, OK?"
Advantages: Perpetually aroused
Disadvantages: Perpetually aroused

The Dreamer - "Someday I'm going to be rich and famous.I don't know how, but--"
Advantages: Tells good stories
Disadvantages: Will turn into "Old Man Grumpus"

Mr. Right - "While the servants wash the dishes, let's make love like crazed weasels in my new yacht, ok?"
Advantages: Answer to a woman's prayer
Disadvantages: Hunted to extinction

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